Ever since I was a little kid, I have always liked to observe and listen to older adults. I remember sitting by my grandparents’ side during family get-togethers and just talking to them while the rest of my brothers and cousins played games. There were times when the adults would tell me to go and play instead of just sitting there watching them. I was simply fascinated by their knowledge and wisdom and perspective on life. Take my father for example. He is an extremely intelligent person and a great communicator, but he often times chooses to not engage in conversations despite the fact that he may be the most knowledgeable on the subject. When I was a child, one day I asked him why he did not talk much when we had company over. His response to me was, “Son, you can only learn when you listen to other people. You already know what you think and what your opinion is. By listening, you may pick up on a new perspective that you had not thought of or may learn information that can change your life.” That is one lesson I have always abided by. Two nights ago, I learned another life altering lesson from one of my mentors who is in his late 70s. Let’s call him Rudy.

Time lost while providing.

“I have not heard from you in awhile. Where have you been?” was what Rudy said to me when I answered my cell phone. “I have been traveling and working like crazy,” I said. “Oh, you have been out there providing for your family,” Rudy said. I replied, “Well, you know how that goes.” Then Rudy proceeded to tell me something that hit me like a ton of bricks. “Ja Marr,” he said, “I am retired now, but there was a time when I was just like you…out there providing for my family. I used to go to work at 6:00 AM and come home at 9:00 PM. I would be so tired that I would only have enough energy to grab a quick dinner and go to sleep. It got to the point where my kids were surprised to see me when I was home. I missed many family gatherings and significant events in my children’s lives because I was out their Providing for my family. Although I made a great living and gave my family the best material items, what I realize now, many years later was that I had spent more time Providing for my family than I did Being there for my family. And now, here I am at the twilight of my life trying to make up for lost time. However, it is too late for me and my kids. Now I am trying to do what I wish I had done years ago with my grandkids. I am just happy that I have lived long enough to do it.”

The balancing act.

After I hung up the phone with Rudy, I sat on my sofa for about 30 minutes contemplating what he had just told me. Although I have made a conscious effort to balance work and family, you can never be reminded enough of the importance of doing that. As a matter of fact, a key component of The Kaizen Way Philosophy that I developed is based on being as efficient as possible at work or in your career so that you don’t take up family time with unfinished work. If you want to learn more about The Kaizen process of being successful at work and at home, please e-mail me at info@thekaizenway.com.

I hope that everyone reading this always keeps my conversation with Rudy top of mind. At the end of the day, as you are Providing for your family, don’t forget to Be there for your family as well.

Time to tell your Story!

Please send me your comments or stories in response to this post.

To Your Story!

Ja Marr