“Excuse me,” I said to the stewardess. “I would like to order the California Salad.” With a look of dismay and frustration she said, “I need to find out if we still have any salads left.” And with that, she stomped down the aisle way toward the back of the plane. Sure, the beverage cart had come by about 15 minutes earlier, but I was on a cross country flight and had fallen asleep during the initial cart service. The stewardess’ did however give me a menu which means that you don’t have to order exactly at the time they first come by. We still had 3 hours left in the air!
10 minutes later, I am still in my seat waiting for my salad. Curious about the status of my request, I flagged down another stewardess who happened to be passing by and politely told her that I had ordered a salad about ten minutes ago and wanted to check on the status of it. The only word she uttered to me was, “ok,” and then she went to the back of the plane…the same direction the first stewardess had gone. I remained calm thinking that my salad would be there any second. My stomach started to growl with anticipation and I was getting hungrier by the minute; just imagining that wonderful salad I was about to eat.
12 minutes goes by and still no salad! What is going on? I thought to myself. All I want is a salad. Either they have it or they don’t. I decided to ring the call button; but just as I was reaching up to push it, I heard the voice of a stewardess asking if people wanted coffee. My first thought was…they had all this time to make coffee, but can’t bring me a pre-made salad. At this point, I am beyond famished, and starting to get really upset. But as I normally do, I try and look at the bright side and turn a bad situation into a learning experience. What did I learn? Avoid flying on this airline.
A few minutes later, the stewardess that was passing out coffee, reached my seat and asked me if I wanted coffee. This was the second stewardess that I had flagged down earlier to ask about the status of my salad. It was almost as if she did not recognize me. I asked her again, “I ordered a salad nearly 30 minutes ago. Do you know where it is.? All she said was, “let me check.” And once she was out of coffee, she went back to the back of the plane. A couple of minutes later, she came up to me and said, “Sir, its coming.” Why she did not have it, I don’t know, but nevertheless, I almost jumped for joy with the idea of just eating this salad.
5 minutes later. I decided to look towards the back of the plane. I wish I had not done that, because what I saw nearly made me jump out the window. I saw the original stewardess I had ordered the California salad from, walking down the aisle with a snack tray in her hand, asking the passengers if they wanted cookies, or peanuts. I pinched myself to see if I was dreaming. It hurt, so I was not. She finally made her way to me. She asked me if I wanted cookies or peanuts. I looked around to see if I was on candid camera of MTVs Punked, but when Ashton Kucher did not come out, I knew this was reality.
I must have really mentally checked out for a second, because she asked me again, “Sir, do you want peanuts or cookies?” I said, “No, but I would like my California salad.” Then in a very nonchalant fashion she said, “OH, let me get it for you.” And with that, she went to the back of the plane. At that point, I said forget it, and decided to just go to sleep. I was awakened by a tap on my shoulder and a voice saying, “Sir, it will be $8.00.” as she placed the California salad on my lap. I gave her the money and she just walked away without uttering another word.
All I could think to myself as I ravaged thru my California salad was that this would never have happened on Southwest Airlines!